It's cool by the pool - right? [COLUMN]
Actually it's a Goddamn mess by the pool. The summary of the story once again:
Proud and important woman has to squat in her home's sauna room and rent out her home to tenants.
As such she begins to occupy more and more of my space (using the swimming pool area as her personal washroom and lounge, and the garage as her storage depot and kitchen).
Naturally this creates more and more friction between the two of us, exacerbated by the fact that she obviously has no money.
She gives me an eviction notice on 9 April immediately after receiving a list of demands requiring her to stop using the garage as her kitchen and to clean up the garbage or face lower rent.
I begin to clean out the garage in order to solve the problem of her playing Nigella in my garage.
She accuses me of malicious damage to property, reports it to the police and wants R1000 in damages.
She removes the electric cable from the refrigerator plugs it into the wall of the garage and snaps a photo of this as evidence of my evil behaviour.
I'm not sure if you can tell from the image above but it is difficult to open the car door with a table piled to the roof with boxes right beside it. Under the table are carpets, and hanging from the roof is a boat. When I moved in I was told to use this garage but that didn't happen for about 12 months because her husband in absentio had left it there and none of its electronics worked, and she'd lost the key. The new tenants finally dragged it out with ropes and chains using one of their cars. They then asked that their garage be emptied of junk. Guess where all the junk went?
In summary this is about a property owner who has tremendous amounts of debt, and no money, and wishes to take over my accommodation. I don't intend remaining here but I want my deposit back. It's hard to imagine someone who freezes left over bones for nibbling later will have a few thousand rand lying around. Her suing for damages of R1000 when the deposit more than covers that ought to put the hysteria of this idea into perspective.
First thing tomorrow I am to report to a police station and go to court. I question the truth of this since the case was only opened on Tuesday, and tomorrow is Thursday. That's quite a rapid turnaround for South Africa's legal process.
Today I did sms the landlady:
When can you refund our deposit.
Her response, several hours later:
Matter handed over to trust attorneys who will address u in due course.
This was an opportunity for her to say: Great, let's agree on when you leave and sort out who owes who what. Her message shifts responsibility and the obligation to pay away.
I asked her to provide her attorneys contact details.
No response.
We've been discussing how she will prove R1000 worth of damages. I've theorised that she spent this morning unpacking two cardboard boxes filled with dishes, found a handy hammer, and smashed them one at a time. 50 plates at R20 apiece ought to do the trick.
I'll obviously provide details on this farce after tomorrow, assuming I am not behind bars for thinking negative thoughts.
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