There was a time where it was dead normal to have one partner your whole life. You encountered a few people of the opposite sex, and any intimacy at all became part and parcel of a marriage. And then you got on with the life task of being a spouse, and a parent, and bringing home the bacon and building a home together. Today it's not unusual for people to have dozens of partners (married or not), and getting divorced and ferrying kids backwards and forwards between spouses is common practise. There's also a clear behaviour going on. Once the kids are away, the games begin again.
We've gotten very used to having our own living space, own car, own this or that. And for that reason, everyone else is secondary. We think nothing now to rescind relationships. We delete people out of our lives with as much afterthought as closing an email or deleting a sms. The virtual world of Facebook becomes a substitute for reality - in fact it's the new reality for some. It's a very low value, low quality existence.
Our society is sick with Narcissism. With the things we accumulate. Our sexuality - what we do with our bodies is another example. If you've ever wondered whether excessive masturbation wasn't a good idea, the answer is, yes. Masturbating excessively is just one form of narcissism. That time spent pleasuring yourself could be better spent walking in nature, or sharing affection with another human being. What is scary is that some people eventually find themselves preferring themselves to others. And we are becoming more and more unpleasant to be around. We're forgetting our manners, because we're not having an awful lot of practise...
A friend of mine told me how he dresses he daughter while she is still under the blankets so she doesn't get cold. I first thought this was spoiling the child terribly. Then I thought: her future husband needs to measure up to a high standard of attentiveness. Of care, and consideration. A parent needs to give their children as much love as they can, and that is the benchmark a future husband will be measured against.
Instead, parents neglect or abandon their children. Is it any wonder that young people jump into relationships satisfied with what little they get, and then after a short period, find themselves alone and unhappy? Because no standard was set, and all that remains is an overwhelming sense of feeling lost and unloved and wanting to belong. There are so many people in this world who choose to take advantage of this in the young and innocent. And they do. Because they feel they deserve everything they can get, on a Planet filled with Narcissists.
There is a cure for our Narcissism. Make living the way we do unaffordable. It's happening right now. There will be plenty of gnashing of teeth in times to come.
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