Starting the vacation off with a week of sickness (I still feel a bit groggy) was a recipe for a ruined holiday. Although I have started training (ran 6 laps with Barendine yesterday), I'm feeling pretty depressed. Just been sedentary for long enough to absorb a lot of mental junk.
I'm just about through my Business Economics marking. Still have Economics (Grade 10 and 11) to do. I'm struggling to get through it because it is so boring, and most students have written a lot of garbage. The last paper was covered in scrawl, but the student only got 23 facts out of 300 right. It takes a lot more time to make sure a fact is wrong, than checking correctness (when they have studied).
Woke up this morning and recalled some of the Disappointments. It's par for the course to be a bit down. I think I am also feeling an unsettled sense of being unhappy and dissatisfied with where I am, and what I have achieved. I guess I'd like my writing to be further along than it is. It doesn't help having the people at the magazine trying to con you out of almost R8 000. I guess today felt like gates had been closed behind my gate all over the place. The trick is probably not to less it bother you, to perservere.
I did that in High School once, where despite feeling not so good, I perservered for months. Finally I found out I had tick bite fever. After 8 monthys of feeling up and down, cold sweats and fluctuating energy levels (I thought I was battling my own lazinees) my spirit took a hard knock.
I see a friend of mine, Allan, has also sent out a mass emailer inviting a bunch of people, including an ex-girlfriend and her dwarf husband - people I absolutely loathe - to his latest gig. Don't really appreciate that at all.
Need to getaway before school starts. Need to get on the bike again as well.
At least from here on out I can concentrate on training (have agreed with Barendine to start preparing for next year's Ironman).
And there are some good prospects coming up. Weg/Go have expressed interest in me writing a story on the Sendingfietstoer. That could be awesome. Guess when you're a bit down you have to look up to what you can do, not what's been and done.
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