Men secretly divorce wives - can you blame 'em?

SHOOT: I was in a live-in relationship from hell. The basis of the relationship eventually became a currency of threats and blackmail. And of course, when you ask the person, nicely, to leave, they refuse. If you try to force the issue, you're 'intimidating, harassing' and, this is pushing it, 'assaulting' them. Of course, despite all the invisible bruises and snow white bloodshed, they're never afraid to be alone with you in the dark.

I was warned that if you live with someone for 6 months, and then try to kick them out, you can be slapped with a maintenance order. This is how someone you love turns into a feckless parasite. I also think a lot of women abuse the unwritten rule that guys don't hit or abuse women. They hit, they scream, they antagonise and accuse. Of course, the tragedy is that given enough time, the guy has got to snap, and of course, then it's entirely his fault. Careful guys.

clipped from www.sowetan.co.za THOUSANDS of women are sitting at home happily kissing their husbands, oblivious to the fact that the men they wake up next to every morning have secretly divorced them years ago. The courts are dealing with a growing number of cases in which women are battling to reverse divorce decrees granted to their husbands without their knowledge. Sowetan is aware of six cases at present in the Johannesburg family court. But a highly placed justice department official says there are hundreds of such cases in the country’s courts. Gloria Mailula of Moletsane, Soweto, told Sowetan she got the shock of her life when her husband slapped her with a divorce decree after a tiff. “I don’t know how he got the divorce because I was never summoned to court.