(Click on the title above to link to an audio clip)
Today my bozo boss called me into the regular Friday-night-before-payday meeting. I knew he was going to try to shuck me out of my salary. If you're working in Korea (or anywhere in the Far East), here's a good example of how to deal with a boss who is an asshole. And you don't even have to be a lawyer...
Actually, you know I started my university education with a law degree, and after I changed to a Commercial Degree I still studied Commercial Law. Law of course is not just knowing about what's fair and reasonable, it's being able to argue convincingly (whether what you're arguing is completely rational or not). Of course the best arguments are reasonable and rational. Anything that is self-evident needs no defense.
Back to reality. Here's the context. My pay day is the middle of next week, and I have come back to work after taking a day off sick. Although I worked today I am still suffering from a high fever, headaches, body ache and general malaise.
So my esteemed colleague graciously invites me into his office. I deferred, by calling a friend first...who had invited me to dinner. This wasn't contrived, but of course, him asking me to join him in a meeting, and me first making a call, shows that his power is not to be taken for granted, I'm showing that it's being called into question.
So the next thing I'm in his office and as I'm about to sit down, he says, "Close the door."
He starts off by pulling a face and seeming extremely upset, disappointed and annoyed. He tells me many, many parents are complaining about me, are unhappy about me. This is obviously embarassing, discomforting and disturbing. I care about the job I'm doing, I care that I'm proving my students with a meaningful experience. So I am hurt and stung by this.
I ask him about these upset parents, and he tells me they came to see him yesterday when I was sick. He said they wanted to talk to me, but I wasn't there. This sounds a little dodgy...but I say, "You know, I'd like to speak to the parents."
He's like, "No no no, they are very angry. VERY angry with you."
So I say, okay, well then let me understand what I did wrong and I can talk to them and apologise. He blinks at me.
I explain: "Yes, I can say, what did I do, okay, okay, right, I'm sorry..."
He shakes his hands at me and says, "No,no,no...They don't understand English..."
Now I'm onto him. I suggest his fiance translate for us, and I impress upon him that I want to meet them...
By now it's clear what he's doing, because he's done it before. He's manufacturing complaints, a mixture of likely and ludicrous material, and then once he's showed me what a bad teacher I am, he says, "So, this is what I'm paying you this month." But I can already see a white sheet of paper with numbers on it, and I can already see the punchline. Why Jim, you're such a funny guy.
Some background: In my very first week he cut about W7 000 from my salary, saying he forgot to add a decimal to the amount taxed on my salary. He called me at home to ask if that was okay. Subsequently, we've had a handful of meetings, all on friday nights when I'm about to go home, always featuring complaints and then featuring the money related punchline. He tried to get W100 000 for my Japan ticket (and I negotiated W50 000 back).
He'd also asked me to slice W200 000 off my salary because by then I was working an hour less a day than when I started, and I immediately accepted that, although the contract says the working time and salary can't be changed. But that particular meeting seemed reasonable so I accepted that.
Today he wanted to slice double that - W400 000 (or about R2 000) from my salary. His rationale was based on, as far as I could tell, the fact that I didn't work yesterday, and then his list of grievances.
I told him I was sick for one day (equivalent to about W100 000 pay - or R500), not 4 days. And I came to work today, even though I was sick, to help him. I said, "I'm here, helping you."
Then he complained about the parents again.
Frankly, I am not at all sure the parents he's talking about are real. I think he's hallucinating, or he's been watching too many movies. I wonder if he's ever watched A Few Good Men?
Me/Lieutenant Kaffee: What kind of school are you running here? Disneyland? Answer the question.
Direcor/Jessep: You want answers?
Me/Lieutenant Kaffee: I think I'm entitled to them.
Direcor/Jessep: You want answers?!
Me/Lieutenant Kaffee: I want the truth.
Direcor/Jessep: You can't handle the truth.
Son, here in Korea we have to teach children about icecream, and candy, and how to have fun. This job is an important responsibility, and can only be done with God and gum. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Montesori? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for your Won, and you curse the bad English books. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know -- that children learning nothing, while tragic, probably saved lives; and my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, helps children have fun.
You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me in this hagwon -- you need me in this hagwon.
We use words like "eat," "games," "fun." We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punch line.
I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide and then questions the manner in which I provide it.
I would rather that you just said "thank you" for the little I pay you, and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up an English book and stand the post. Either way, I don't give a DAMN what you think you're entitled to!
Me/Lieutenant Kaffee: Are you trying to cheat me out of money?
Director/Jessep: I am doing what any other --
Me/Lieutenant Kaffee: -- Are you cheating me?!"
Director/Jessep: You're god damn right I am!!!
I told him if the parents saw what these kids are allowed to do in class,things I try to discourage (but things he permits), they would be very unhappy. They would be unhappy to pay for sending their kids to his school, if they're allowed to eat food and slurp icecreams, be rambunctious, and obnoxious for the duration of lessons, to come in 20 minutes late for classes, etc. They are supposed to learn English, learn something. I said I am trying to teach English, I am trying to apply high standards, but the kids understand from him an entirely different set of standards. If they misbehave and I send them to him, he says, "It's okay, don't do it again."
He happened to step into a class as a kid said to me, "Teacher, you're crazy." That's fine of course, I have a sense of humor. He doesn't though. He makes his list of grievances and wants to cry about them every Friday before my pay day. Silly puppet.
Can YOU handle the truth, because you're about to get a monthful.
So here's what you do (here's what I did):
I wrote down on a piece of paper his amount, and put a cross next to it. And I said, "This is not acceptable."
Then underneath that I wrote something else, and said, this is acceptable.
We argued for about 40 minutes. During that time he complained of having no time, and having a headache. I said, "I have a headache. I am sick. I came to work today to help you." He obviously bargained on me being tired, and worn out, and that I've give in to his demands on a Friday night just so I could go home. He kept saying, "Just go home and think about it." I kept saying, "No, let's come to an agreement now."
So I took the issue to another level. Not everyone can be this hardball, because not everyone is willing to risk losing their home, and their job, in a faraway country. It's a kind've scary thing to undertake.
But you know, I am willing to risk this, and I made this clear. I said, "I've asked for this amount X. You're offering me Y. If you pay me Y, I am going to be very angry. I will want to leave this school very soon. You can start looking for a new teacher today, this weekend."
He was like, "No, no,no..." He assured me he hadn't called any agents etc.
I said, "But I want to help you. Even though I want to help you, I'm unhappy here, so once you pay me, I want to leave. You need to find a new teacher as soon as possible."
And then I stressed the point that him paying me the amount I asked for would make me more predisposed to staying until he found another teacher.
He picked up a Korean/English dictionary and pointed to the translation: impatient, irritated.
I didn't follow him there; was he saying I am impatient, or that he was. It was pretty obvious how we both felt. So not sure why he was pointing it out.
We agreed that even if a new teacher came next week, that would be fine with me and he could accept that. But he asked me not to tell the students that I'd be leaving soon. In this way, he pissed all over his own contract, where he required two months notice from me, and a month's notice from himself.
Finally he asked me to be 'kind and lovely', and then said, "Okay I'll pay X."
This crook tried to con me out of W400 000 (W300 000 if one accepts the sick day, but he gets paid whether I am at school that day or not), and I had to 'negotiate' my way just to get back to the original salary I should be paid anyway.
This was nevertheless an important victory.
1. It proves beyond doubt that this guy is a major asshole.
2. He nullified his own contract through his verbal admission that no notice was required, either from me or him (and I'd already given him my notice).
3. It's important to stand up for yourself at hagwon's, or be walked all over.
4. The strategy is: a number of 'issues' are raised against you. The point of this becomes clear, he'll justify these grievances by taking your money/giving you extra hours or extra work.
5. The idea is wear you down, especially after work on a Friday night. Don't let them.
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